Taming the Green Tsunami

No peaceful sylvan setting exists here at Bufflehead Pond Farm... not yet, anyway.  We can maintain our illusions with a restful view of the duck pond, or the full moon rising above old growth Douglas firs, or the raucous peeps of thousands of tiny frogs along the banks of the wetlands. But while it seems idyllic on the surface, we now know that the forest is hungry for our land and intends to devour it all. Undaunted, we wield chainsaws, heavy tractors, shovels, loppers, scythes, rakes, and are seriously considering purchasing a flame thrower.

But I digress.


Poor Bruce has been putting up with my whining about the pending invasion of those horrid tent caterpillars.  Last year those nasty creatures marched forward in a fuzzy blanket of orange and black, devouring every living green thing in their path (except blackberries... nothing eats blackberry vines). The moth mothers of these creepy crawlers lay a bazillion eggs on the trunks of the alder trees that rim the back of the property, and in the spring the larvae hatch to nest in and feast on the alder leaves until the tree is completely naked. After that, the ravenous baby caterpillars descend to lay waste to our vegetable garden.

Tent Caterpillar Traffic Jam on our back porch

To eliminate these creatures from our garden without frog-killing pesticides, we first have to eliminate the weedy and invasive alder trees at the back of the property.  There are so many caterpillars in them during tent caterpillar season that when you stand in the forest you can hear the soft rain of continuous pooping from their perches high in the trees... literally, the most heinous shit storm imaginable.

Bruce to the rescue, riding high on his Kubota (the farm equivalent of a shining white horse), felling and limbing trees, chipping up the branches to make garden mulch, and unearthing the old stumps. This last step must be done because the pernicious things will just grow right back if left in the ground.

Sir Zelazoski and his trusty steed

Three down...

... three million to go...

What we really hope to accomplish with all this effort is to open up the woods to some sunlight and to clean out the wetland area that has become choked with alders, blackberries and other nasty territory grabbers.  We have some beautiful old cedars and firs that are being shaded by the fast-growing deciduous trees/weeds/vines and are starving for sunlight.

But that's not all. A green tsunami can rise virtually overnight to consume all open grassland that's not mowed regularly. It begins innocently enough: tall grasses grow taller, die back in the fall and flatten into a soft wheaten layer on the ground. Then, stealthy blackberries send runners invisibly under this mat of dead grass, traveling 25-30 feet in all directions, anchoring with roots at frequent intervals along the way. Evil and insidious. Then the canes start to sprout everywhere, advancing the frontline of the attack. As the canes leaf out, they provide shade in their understory, creating a perfect environment for the stinging nettles that are just waiting for their shelter to be created. (If you've ever picked blackberries in the Pacific Northwest, you know that the thorns are a significantly lesser threat to your skin than nettles are.) Blackberries and nettles are partners in crime, making sure that any attack on either will result in serious and unforgettable injury to the perpetrator.

Baby stinging nettle lurks...

Blackberries going undercover 

Encouraged, the blackberry canes develop into an impenetrable thicket, the nettles proliferate, and the alder trees sprout baby alders from their roots, and another acre is lost. 

...blocks sunlight for the cedars

Impenetrable thicket...

Fortunately, both of us enjoy working the land, beating back all invaders, and expanding our garden, using all those lovely alderwood chips as natural mulch. 

All is good. Nature wants to be natural, and humans want to control their environment. Any guesses who will win?  Regardless, it's going to be eternal enjoyment for us, and an excellent workout routine, right here at Bufflehead Pond Farm.

:D